"Temperance Reversed: Too much introspection. Possibility of being stuck in past in career or relationships. Stop looking back and move forward. Time to take charge and get on with plan. Let your hair down and relax your guard a bit. Time for some fun. Take a chance on something new and exciting. Welcome new ideas, perhaps with radical undertones. Take up a new hobby or sport. It's time to let go a bit and enjoy a new vitality. "
That's today's randomly generated Tarot card, courtesy of my Facebook. Temperance has always been one of my favorite Tarot cards, but too much of it can lead to stagnation, boredom, and depression. I'm not just posting 'cause I like the card; it seems very appropriate for my day in general.
I had a lovely time at war practice. For the first half-hour or so I really wasn't sure it was going to be worth the drive, the time, and the energy I could have otherwise spent sleeping, but by the end of the day I was really glad I went. It was a good day fencing-wise, personally, and fencing-relatedly. :)
More on that tomorrow. Now--to bed, for fencing gear repair, cuddles, and Samurai Champloo!
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Fighter Practice, 01/27/2010
Fencing on Wed. was generally uneventful.
Did some slow work with Theo--got her to close the line, lunge properly, and guard her head with her dagger all at once, which was cool. She was just sort of jabbing at me with her arm and no body commitment, so I explained a little bit about calibration and how lunging properly can actually help protect you better than just being out of the way and poking with your arm while keeping your body as far back as possible. She seemed to get it.
I asked her after if it was okay that I was dumping all this information on her, and she said yes, so I guess I'm doing the right stuff. :)
After that I fenced with Elo. She's a fun fight--her primary offhand is cloak, so even though we were going with sword and baton, she had a lot of swirly motion in her body--like when she parried she would roll her whole offhand-shoulder forward like she was trying to foul my point with a nonexistent cloak. Of course, I realize this now, but at the time I was just sort of distracted. She used the foul-with-cloak-then-counterpunch technique really well, especially given that she was using a baton. :) I should have manipulated that more effectively--every time she did it, I either died or parried messily. If I'd had a dagger, I could have rushed in and ganked her, but didn't happen.
Good point control, though. I snaked in and tapped her all pretty on the chest a couple times, and I solved the baton problem by taking her hand. Over and over and over. Then I would give up my baton, she would take my primary hand, and we would start over. Not effective.
In other news, I love my baton. It's good that I don't fight with it very often, because it's totally a crutch, but I love it so much. It's like a huge, heavy dagger that I can beat up other people's swords with, distract them, or use as a windshield wiper. I don't need good defense as long as I have my baton, right? Right?
...Guys?
Did some slow work with Theo--got her to close the line, lunge properly, and guard her head with her dagger all at once, which was cool. She was just sort of jabbing at me with her arm and no body commitment, so I explained a little bit about calibration and how lunging properly can actually help protect you better than just being out of the way and poking with your arm while keeping your body as far back as possible. She seemed to get it.
I asked her after if it was okay that I was dumping all this information on her, and she said yes, so I guess I'm doing the right stuff. :)
After that I fenced with Elo. She's a fun fight--her primary offhand is cloak, so even though we were going with sword and baton, she had a lot of swirly motion in her body--like when she parried she would roll her whole offhand-shoulder forward like she was trying to foul my point with a nonexistent cloak. Of course, I realize this now, but at the time I was just sort of distracted. She used the foul-with-cloak-then-counterpunch technique really well, especially given that she was using a baton. :) I should have manipulated that more effectively--every time she did it, I either died or parried messily. If I'd had a dagger, I could have rushed in and ganked her, but didn't happen.
Good point control, though. I snaked in and tapped her all pretty on the chest a couple times, and I solved the baton problem by taking her hand. Over and over and over. Then I would give up my baton, she would take my primary hand, and we would start over. Not effective.
In other news, I love my baton. It's good that I don't fight with it very often, because it's totally a crutch, but I love it so much. It's like a huge, heavy dagger that I can beat up other people's swords with, distract them, or use as a windshield wiper. I don't need good defense as long as I have my baton, right? Right?
...Guys?
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Angels Melee, 01/16/2010
I've had the same issue fighting melee for awhile--well, I guess it's two problems. 1. I have trouble going forward (this also applies to tourney fencing, but I'm much more timid than usual on the melee field), and 2. I get really bad tunnel vision.
The first problem happens in line fights. Let me clarify--I'm not afraid of getting hit or killed or whatever. I'm rarely in the dead-center of a line and have never been "that guy" who gets killed and then leaves a huge hole in the line that collapses the whole thing. I'm not afraid of getting hit too hard or anything--I take a certain pride in my fencing bruises, thank you very much. :)
The problem illustrates an overall lack of confidence in my defensive (and therefore, by extension, offensive) skills which I'd really like to change. I have no problem dying over and over in the interest of learning something, but when I die in a line fight I don't feel like I learn anything--it's very easy for me to get frustrated in a line fight, unlike in other types of melee fighting, because I feel like it's so unproductive me intellectually. I have plenty of confidence but I'm not quite up to speed, physically or conceptually. It's frustrating, and I don't really want to talk more about it right now because I've already filled my frustration quota for today. :) Maybe it's just that I need more practice. I don't know--part of the reason this is frustrating at all is because I can't identify why I'm having this problem, I just know I'm having it.
Same with the tunnel vision thing. I tend to freeze up more in melees, possibly because so much other shit is going on around me, and when I'm one-on-one with someone else I make shitty little potshots with no originality or tactics whatsoever. I think it's because I have so much other crap on my mind, first and foremost being ready to shout at people if someone's coming up alongside or behind them, and secondly not getting sneaked up on or DFB'd myself. Practice practice practice. How to improve my concentration, I don't know. I should probably not be allowed to boss small groups around for awhile. I never seem to do anything good with them--I just do the obvious thing because I feel like everyone's waiting on me, and that rarely works well. But practice practice practice fucking practice. Damn it.
Love each other. Respect all life. And don't run with your spears. --Avatar.
Very good pointwork on Sat. Laertes asked me right after the last melee what I thought I did well, and I sourly replied that "Well, I went backward pretty good." He just kept at me until I confessed to managing my point pretty well and being able to let go of my frustration after about the first 10 minutes of melee (I'd had some trouble getting into the headspace and that was bugging me until I made a conscious effort to ground myself and concentrate, dammit! chill out and concentrate!), so that was good. Must remember the good. Never forget the funny. Have more fun. Eat your veggies. Et cetera.
Hope to post a little bit more about some other potentially very good developments later on in the month. Mum's the word for now! :)
Thanks for reading this, btw. I haven't gotten many comments, but I've gotten a lot of feedback off-LJ saying that people enjoy reading this, and I like attention! I'm glad you guys are enjoying my mental diarrhea as I try to keep my brain in sync with my body. And vice versa.
The first problem happens in line fights. Let me clarify--I'm not afraid of getting hit or killed or whatever. I'm rarely in the dead-center of a line and have never been "that guy" who gets killed and then leaves a huge hole in the line that collapses the whole thing. I'm not afraid of getting hit too hard or anything--I take a certain pride in my fencing bruises, thank you very much. :)
The problem illustrates an overall lack of confidence in my defensive (and therefore, by extension, offensive) skills which I'd really like to change. I have no problem dying over and over in the interest of learning something, but when I die in a line fight I don't feel like I learn anything--it's very easy for me to get frustrated in a line fight, unlike in other types of melee fighting, because I feel like it's so unproductive me intellectually. I have plenty of confidence but I'm not quite up to speed, physically or conceptually. It's frustrating, and I don't really want to talk more about it right now because I've already filled my frustration quota for today. :) Maybe it's just that I need more practice. I don't know--part of the reason this is frustrating at all is because I can't identify why I'm having this problem, I just know I'm having it.
Same with the tunnel vision thing. I tend to freeze up more in melees, possibly because so much other shit is going on around me, and when I'm one-on-one with someone else I make shitty little potshots with no originality or tactics whatsoever. I think it's because I have so much other crap on my mind, first and foremost being ready to shout at people if someone's coming up alongside or behind them, and secondly not getting sneaked up on or DFB'd myself. Practice practice practice. How to improve my concentration, I don't know. I should probably not be allowed to boss small groups around for awhile. I never seem to do anything good with them--I just do the obvious thing because I feel like everyone's waiting on me, and that rarely works well. But practice practice practice fucking practice. Damn it.
Love each other. Respect all life. And don't run with your spears. --Avatar.
Very good pointwork on Sat. Laertes asked me right after the last melee what I thought I did well, and I sourly replied that "Well, I went backward pretty good." He just kept at me until I confessed to managing my point pretty well and being able to let go of my frustration after about the first 10 minutes of melee (I'd had some trouble getting into the headspace and that was bugging me until I made a conscious effort to ground myself and concentrate, dammit! chill out and concentrate!), so that was good. Must remember the good. Never forget the funny. Have more fun. Eat your veggies. Et cetera.
Hope to post a little bit more about some other potentially very good developments later on in the month. Mum's the word for now! :)
Thanks for reading this, btw. I haven't gotten many comments, but I've gotten a lot of feedback off-LJ saying that people enjoy reading this, and I like attention! I'm glad you guys are enjoying my mental diarrhea as I try to keep my brain in sync with my body. And vice versa.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Fighter Practice, 01/13/2010
Not a great turnout at practice last night. I spent a lot of time with Theo, who is the 16-year-old daughter of Bruce Tiffney, the dean of the college at UCSB I graduated from. She's very sweet and very enthusiastic, but isn't very coordinated. It's like she's spent more time reading and studying than exercising--I imagine I must have been a lot like her when I first started fencing. I got to practice my single against her, which was my only goal for the day, and one of the benefits of fencing with someone so new is that I've got time to analyze my own technique and positioning as I'm doing it, rather than worrying about getting punked in the head and having to start over again.
I was giving her a lot of advice in (what I hope were) bite-sized chunks, and tried to be big on the positive reinforcement. One of the biggest hangups I have learning fencing stuff is that often when I learn something new I like to repeat it three or four times before I can really feel the motion, like it's imprinting itself in my muscle memory. I can understand the how and why of new concepts very quickly, but I need to repeat the motion a few times before I can really start to associate the sensation with "correctness" in my brain and try to make it instinctive. Although I guess if I'm *trying* to make something instinctive I'm sort of defeating myself. This Zen shit is hard! :)
Anyway, I got Theo performing basic lunges with the line closed at appropriate measure with good arm and body position and had her repeat each motion three or four times. I explained some basic tempo and physics stuff about why a lunge protects the attacker even when the opponent counterattacks, and she seemed to get that pretty well. Manda was watching the whole thing and I kept waiting for some additional commentary, but she didn't say anything, so I guess I was doing okay. She's is a fantastic teacher, in my opinion--not many people have the ability to look at someone's body and almost immediately see what's wrong and how to fix it, but I guess she's been watching people fence and learn to fence for so long it's pretty second nature for her. Maybe in three or four years I'll be there too.
I realized as Theo and I were fencing that I could explain what she needed to do in terms of body position and tempo pretty clearly (I think!) but when it came to explaining why I was killing her so often even when she was trying really hard to bat my sword around with all this slashy shit, my language got more vague. This is obviously an indicator of not understanding it as well as I think I do... but which aspects, exactly, I'm not understanding are still a little confusing. Oy.
Part of why she didn't kill me is because she wasn't putting any real force behind any of the slashy crap--there are guys in Isles who can get me with that stuff just because they wham their swords around like the goddamn Highlander and try to grapple with you and end up ganking you messily and too hard with their dagger, other sword, or baton... but that's neither here nor there. Theo did get me a couple times with some very pretty lunges that went in almost exactly the right place--when she was doing Italian stuff her kill/death ratio leveled out dramatically. I don't know if this was because we were both doing Italian or what. Anyway...
I guess this post isn't really about my game, but it's just as interesting for me to analyze someone else's (how apt or inept that analysis is, I can't say). I don't know how to improve my teaching, or if I'm even in a position to be teaching yet... you can't really get adequate feedback from newbies because they're so uncertain anyway, many of them aren't sure if they aren't understanding or if you aren't articulating clearly. In my opinion, the second is usually indicated by the first, but sometimes people have more trouble understanding one particular bit of information or they're like me and they think they get it until they start doing it and then they realize how hard it is. :) It's hard to tell if I was helping Theo last night or just confusing her more--she's so eager to please, I think she was afraid to ask questions.
I should ask Manda how I'm doing, she wouldn't hold any punches. :)
Hopefully I'll get a little bit more self-study in at Angels this weekend.
I was giving her a lot of advice in (what I hope were) bite-sized chunks, and tried to be big on the positive reinforcement. One of the biggest hangups I have learning fencing stuff is that often when I learn something new I like to repeat it three or four times before I can really feel the motion, like it's imprinting itself in my muscle memory. I can understand the how and why of new concepts very quickly, but I need to repeat the motion a few times before I can really start to associate the sensation with "correctness" in my brain and try to make it instinctive. Although I guess if I'm *trying* to make something instinctive I'm sort of defeating myself. This Zen shit is hard! :)
Anyway, I got Theo performing basic lunges with the line closed at appropriate measure with good arm and body position and had her repeat each motion three or four times. I explained some basic tempo and physics stuff about why a lunge protects the attacker even when the opponent counterattacks, and she seemed to get that pretty well. Manda was watching the whole thing and I kept waiting for some additional commentary, but she didn't say anything, so I guess I was doing okay. She's is a fantastic teacher, in my opinion--not many people have the ability to look at someone's body and almost immediately see what's wrong and how to fix it, but I guess she's been watching people fence and learn to fence for so long it's pretty second nature for her. Maybe in three or four years I'll be there too.
I realized as Theo and I were fencing that I could explain what she needed to do in terms of body position and tempo pretty clearly (I think!) but when it came to explaining why I was killing her so often even when she was trying really hard to bat my sword around with all this slashy shit, my language got more vague. This is obviously an indicator of not understanding it as well as I think I do... but which aspects, exactly, I'm not understanding are still a little confusing. Oy.
Part of why she didn't kill me is because she wasn't putting any real force behind any of the slashy crap--there are guys in Isles who can get me with that stuff just because they wham their swords around like the goddamn Highlander and try to grapple with you and end up ganking you messily and too hard with their dagger, other sword, or baton... but that's neither here nor there. Theo did get me a couple times with some very pretty lunges that went in almost exactly the right place--when she was doing Italian stuff her kill/death ratio leveled out dramatically. I don't know if this was because we were both doing Italian or what. Anyway...
I guess this post isn't really about my game, but it's just as interesting for me to analyze someone else's (how apt or inept that analysis is, I can't say). I don't know how to improve my teaching, or if I'm even in a position to be teaching yet... you can't really get adequate feedback from newbies because they're so uncertain anyway, many of them aren't sure if they aren't understanding or if you aren't articulating clearly. In my opinion, the second is usually indicated by the first, but sometimes people have more trouble understanding one particular bit of information or they're like me and they think they get it until they start doing it and then they realize how hard it is. :) It's hard to tell if I was helping Theo last night or just confusing her more--she's so eager to please, I think she was afraid to ask questions.
I should ask Manda how I'm doing, she wouldn't hold any punches. :)
Hopefully I'll get a little bit more self-study in at Angels this weekend.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Fighter Practice, 01/06/2010
ETA: This post was originally on my LiveJournal.
This is the first of what I hope will be a series of posts as I try to improve my fencing game. I'm not locking these to my SCA-peeps group, just in case those of you who aren't in the SCA are interested... but I'm also cutting it in case you aren't. :)
Last week I went fencing for the first time since I tore ligaments in my foot, and it was overall very successful. I hadn't even held trusty Idris for about 2.5 months (blasphemy!), but putting on the gear and picking him up again felt really nice. I've lost some arm and leg musculature in those months--I think that's how Michelle Obama keeps her arms so toned, she secretly works out with a schlager.
I only fought two opponents before my foot started bugging me. Zhivana was my first fight--she deflowered my new dagger, which has yet to be named. I really, really like fighting Zhivana. She always gives me a workout--we have a habit of one kicking the other's ass for 5 or 6 bouts and then switching. New dagger was awesome--felt like a feather in my hand. I only thought it was my baton once or twice and tried to parry shots that I should have caught with my sword, which leads nicely to my next fight...
Lodovico and I went a few rounds before I called on account of tired. I have pretty good point control and was very pleased by how often I took his right hand or arm. On the needs-improvement side, I realized about halfway through our bouts that a) I was taking a lot of shots on the left side of my torso and shoulder and b) my head felt completely unprotected.
Re: the torso shots: I think I need to stop fencing with baton for awhile--the reason I was taking shots on my left side was because I wasn't getting my sword in to parry enough. Part of that's because my arm was tired, but that's not the primary reason--the thought that I actuallyneeded to parry more with my sword didn't even occur to me until we were driving home. My basic guard tends to angle the baton or dagger over the sword, so I can windshield-wiper parry as fast as possible, and using a baton makes up for a lot of sloppiness and reduced speed in my sword arm.
Re: the head shots: Lodovico didn't take any of the offered headshots, but I didn't have the sensation that my face was hanging out with Zhivana, so I think it's because he's a little taller than me. I could understand feeling like my head was unprotected if he was one-shotting me to the face every other bout, but he wasn't--it was just a feeling I had. I think it was a valid feeling, is all. :) One of the weak spots about fencing in Isles is that not many of the potential opponents are taller than I am. Darach's better, but I'm still so self-conscious around all those folks that the (two or three) times I've been to those practices I never fence very much or very well. Which leads me into my next point...
I'm still super-self-conscious about fencing to the point of getting frustrated with myself really easily. I flat out refuse to fight Todde or Dylan anymore because I don't like how angry it makes me. I think it's a combination of being very close to both of them emotionally so I want to feel like Dylan's equal and feel like I'm actually learning the things Todde is teaching when we spar, which I often don't because he kills me so quickly and unfailingly. I actually thought this was me being completely neurotic until I mentioned it to Laertes--he had asked me if I had anyone to spar with regularly and when I said it was just Dylan he said that he'd figured out from living with and fencing with Batista (sp?) that there was some whole other headgame that could play itself out while fencing with your SO that maybe wouldn't be very conducive to a learning environment. I already knew this, but I thought it was just me being crazy. It still may be me being crazy, but now I know it's not justme. :)
It's easier to fight with a) people that I don't know very well or b) people who are categorized as "students, just like me!" in my head, like most of the current Isles crew. I know all of my mental and physical roadblocks are resolvable, but how to resolve them? Not so sure on that. Hence these posts--Imma get edumacated, either by you, gentle readers, with your deft and accurate commentary, or by my own brain because writing shit down is part of how I process difficult mental or emotional concepts.
Unrelated note: I've noticed that my defense is pretty good-okay when I'm just standing still, and even better when I'm backing up and controlling the tempo that way, but when I go forward or someone charges at me at top speed, it all falls apart. Bailing out of a charge and waiting for them to come at me again or trying to get a potshot in while they recover doesn't seem to have much effect. I don't know if I'm afraid of hitting them too hard if I stand my ground and punk 'em or if I just don't like big speedy things rushing at me--probably both. And why does my defense fall apart when I go forward? I should know where my opponents' weapons and offhands are regardless of how near to or far from them I am, and if I'm defending myself properly, the physical proximity to my opponent shouldn't matter.
So, current goals for fencing:
* Go forward more. Laertes said, and it sounds like a good idea.
* Better parries and single-sword defense (or at least better left-handed defense).
* Less thinking and analyzing while fencing, more Zen. Zen fencing. Zencing.
This is the first of what I hope will be a series of posts as I try to improve my fencing game. I'm not locking these to my SCA-peeps group, just in case those of you who aren't in the SCA are interested... but I'm also cutting it in case you aren't. :)
Last week I went fencing for the first time since I tore ligaments in my foot, and it was overall very successful. I hadn't even held trusty Idris for about 2.5 months (blasphemy!), but putting on the gear and picking him up again felt really nice. I've lost some arm and leg musculature in those months--I think that's how Michelle Obama keeps her arms so toned, she secretly works out with a schlager.
I only fought two opponents before my foot started bugging me. Zhivana was my first fight--she deflowered my new dagger, which has yet to be named. I really, really like fighting Zhivana. She always gives me a workout--we have a habit of one kicking the other's ass for 5 or 6 bouts and then switching. New dagger was awesome--felt like a feather in my hand. I only thought it was my baton once or twice and tried to parry shots that I should have caught with my sword, which leads nicely to my next fight...
Lodovico and I went a few rounds before I called on account of tired. I have pretty good point control and was very pleased by how often I took his right hand or arm. On the needs-improvement side, I realized about halfway through our bouts that a) I was taking a lot of shots on the left side of my torso and shoulder and b) my head felt completely unprotected.
Re: the torso shots: I think I need to stop fencing with baton for awhile--the reason I was taking shots on my left side was because I wasn't getting my sword in to parry enough. Part of that's because my arm was tired, but that's not the primary reason--the thought that I actuallyneeded to parry more with my sword didn't even occur to me until we were driving home. My basic guard tends to angle the baton or dagger over the sword, so I can windshield-wiper parry as fast as possible, and using a baton makes up for a lot of sloppiness and reduced speed in my sword arm.
Re: the head shots: Lodovico didn't take any of the offered headshots, but I didn't have the sensation that my face was hanging out with Zhivana, so I think it's because he's a little taller than me. I could understand feeling like my head was unprotected if he was one-shotting me to the face every other bout, but he wasn't--it was just a feeling I had. I think it was a valid feeling, is all. :) One of the weak spots about fencing in Isles is that not many of the potential opponents are taller than I am. Darach's better, but I'm still so self-conscious around all those folks that the (two or three) times I've been to those practices I never fence very much or very well. Which leads me into my next point...
I'm still super-self-conscious about fencing to the point of getting frustrated with myself really easily. I flat out refuse to fight Todde or Dylan anymore because I don't like how angry it makes me. I think it's a combination of being very close to both of them emotionally so I want to feel like Dylan's equal and feel like I'm actually learning the things Todde is teaching when we spar, which I often don't because he kills me so quickly and unfailingly. I actually thought this was me being completely neurotic until I mentioned it to Laertes--he had asked me if I had anyone to spar with regularly and when I said it was just Dylan he said that he'd figured out from living with and fencing with Batista (sp?) that there was some whole other headgame that could play itself out while fencing with your SO that maybe wouldn't be very conducive to a learning environment. I already knew this, but I thought it was just me being crazy. It still may be me being crazy, but now I know it's not justme. :)
It's easier to fight with a) people that I don't know very well or b) people who are categorized as "students, just like me!" in my head, like most of the current Isles crew. I know all of my mental and physical roadblocks are resolvable, but how to resolve them? Not so sure on that. Hence these posts--Imma get edumacated, either by you, gentle readers, with your deft and accurate commentary, or by my own brain because writing shit down is part of how I process difficult mental or emotional concepts.
Unrelated note: I've noticed that my defense is pretty good-okay when I'm just standing still, and even better when I'm backing up and controlling the tempo that way, but when I go forward or someone charges at me at top speed, it all falls apart. Bailing out of a charge and waiting for them to come at me again or trying to get a potshot in while they recover doesn't seem to have much effect. I don't know if I'm afraid of hitting them too hard if I stand my ground and punk 'em or if I just don't like big speedy things rushing at me--probably both. And why does my defense fall apart when I go forward? I should know where my opponents' weapons and offhands are regardless of how near to or far from them I am, and if I'm defending myself properly, the physical proximity to my opponent shouldn't matter.
So, current goals for fencing:
* Go forward more. Laertes said, and it sounds like a good idea.
* Better parries and single-sword defense (or at least better left-handed defense).
* Less thinking and analyzing while fencing, more Zen. Zen fencing. Zencing.
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