Of Angels Anniversary and Primary Secondaries and Secondary Secondaries, and Maybe Even Tertiary Secondaries (and now I'm just being ridiculous)

So yesterday was Angels Anniversary and it was a pretty darn good time. For those of you playing along at home, the Barony of the Angels is (unsurprisingly) most of the modern-day county of Los Angeles, so it's a well populated area and its events usually have pretty good turnout.

Angels is a great midpoint for me and Dylan (coming from Darach to the Northwest) to meet up with a lot of our friends from Lyondemere, Altavia, Angels, Gyldenholt, and Calafia. It was great to see some new faces yesterday on the rapier field as well. The Angels fighters are also sporting very spiffy new tabards.

The tourney format was a Swiss five, which is definitely growing on me--I enjoy getting to fight a lot and having a decreased focus on "I have to win my next fight or I'm out of the tourney" or "If I beat this guy, he's out, which leaves her and her and him and him and him to beat, which means at least five rounds, so I'd better conserve my energy, oh wait, I just drew that guy for this next round, so..." I enjoy the forced breaks in routine that come from having to choose different offhands in each round, and I enjoy getting to fight through a whole tournament up to semi-finals.

That being said, I didn't fight too terribly well yesterday. I had trouble with my dagger and buckler fights, but I did okay with case, cloak, and baton, which was surprising. Having trouble with my old standards seems to have become my new standard in tournies--I've been having trouble concentrating on my fights, as referenced in my last post, and I think mixing it up with some new offhands was good for me. It seemed to ground me and keep me concentrating--with case and baton I got my opponents' blades off-line and managed to get a throat shot (case) and a stomach shot (baton, while we were both on the ground). My cloak fight was fun--I don't remember much of it, but I remember enjoying it. :)

Fast forward to practice this morning, where I worked a lot on cloak with Don Alex K. Between Anniversary yesterday and practice today, something clicked--I was cloakin' it up big time.

It took some minor adjustments ("Sorry! Parried my own sword again!") but the cloak made my parries and the connection between my swordhand and my offhand-hand much more fluid and functional. I'd still been having some trouble with some of the more interesting dagger parries (ie, anything that doesn't make the dagger look like a windshield wiper), but I found myself doing a lot more complicated and bold parries with the cloak for reasons I can't really explain yet.

Anyway, it was a useful bit of data--maybe my problem with my primary secondaries (ahahahahahaha SEE WHAT I DID THERE) is that I fight with them too much. Maybe they're just getting stale.

I'm not sure how much merit is in that line of thinking, because I know there are still hangups in there I need to work through. Switching to a different offhand for a spell isn't going to improve my dagger parries if all they need is more practice. If I'm having a mental block brought on by some fundamental incorrect assumptions about the offhand itself, however, mixing it up with something new might be just the thing. We'll see.

A Widdle Personal Update

Finally! Finally! Finally the rain stopped! Halleluia! Praise the gods! Dance and sing in an emphatically non-rain-dancey way!

Yes, Sunday was the first time I got out to Darach practice in the last 3 weeks, because it was the first time Darach actually had practice in 3 weeks. I love love love having practice on the weekends, and I love love love having practice outdoors, but in the late winter/early spring it does make all practice plans pretty tentative--especially this year, when we've had a wetter, colder February and March than I've ever seen in Southern California. Don't get me wrong, I loves me some rain (reminds me of those foggy days in the Bay Area), but it does make fencing less likely.

I was a little tentative fencing on Sunday, because I'd spent a few hours at a pre-natal yoga class the day before (no, not for me--for a friend of mine whose husband couldn't make it). The class turned out to be about 50% individual yoga, which I'd never really done before (WiiFit aside), so I spent a lot of time with weight on both arms and/or my feet flexed. I was worried that after two days of exercise, my elbow and foot would be complaining loudly on Monday, but so far they both feel fine. I iced my foot Sunday night and took Advil before and after exercising on Sunday, and things seems to be holding up pretty well. We'll see how I feel after King's Hunt this weekend, where I'll hopefully get to fence at least a little bit two days in a row.

Drills and Such

Other than playtesting the new melee scenario (see followup post), I got to spend some one-on-one time drilling with Laertes, which was great. I really feel like I've been slowly (slooooooowly) improving over the winter, and doing the same drills I've been doing off-and-on for the last year or so is a good touchstone for me. It's nice to do a drill and think Okay, that's easier than it was three months ago, or Okay, I'm better at this part, now I need to focus on fixing this more advanced thing.

One thing Laertes observed, which I think is definitely true and led me into some more complicated musing, was that I'm much more confident when I'm fighting him. It's true--I'm more relaxed, more aggressive, and more self-assured. At the time, I said it was because we were just doing drills and I could expect him to throw one of three or four shots, so I got to turn the more watchful, anticipatory part of my brain off... but then he switched styles and it turned out that I maintained the attitude, even when we weren't drilling.

This is a behavior I've noticed with folks I'm used to fencing (folks I started fencing with in Isles, Laertes, friends from various fighting units I've practiced with, etc.) and it's sort of a good and a bad thing--I can relax enough to concentrate on fine-tuning my technique, which is cool, but it still only happens with people I'm fairly familiar and comfortable with, not all the time. I'd love to be able to bring that attitude to all of my fencing endeavors, not just practice with people I'm close to or have fenced with a lot.

I think that's one of those things that will come with time, although probably more time than I'd like. I do have a deep vein of self-consciousness that comes out when I'm fencing (most of the rest of the time, it's covered by a deluge of snark and one-liners). I guess I'm worried about being too easy a fight, about people who are watching forming bad opinions of me and my meager skillz, of looking like a doofus (more than usual). 

Oddly, that self-consciousness might contribute to my strong drive to be chivalrous and generally well-behaved on the field. I have a much higher opinion of people who are weaker fencers with unfailing courtesy than I do of people who win every tournament they enter and have every award their Kingdom has for rapier, who are unfailingly rude and dismissive--you know, the people who clearly think more highly of themselves and their "accomplishments" than they do anyone else, because they don't have to respect anyone who isn't exactly like them and doesn't meet their narrow and self-serving criteria of success. I'd rather be a shitty fencer who has a reputation for good times and good behavior on the field than the best fencer in the Society who has to have all the doorways in her house widened to get her head through, know what I mean?

Anyway, more of the same. Practice practice practice. Maybe I should just fence naked for a few months and get all the self-consciousness out of my system through over-exposure. :) 

Keep Calm and Carry On

Hi all! I just wanted to drop a brief update here--there's not much new going on over here in Chateau Enid, but there are a couple of things worth noting.

I've been going to Darach practice recently, because my work weeks have been super busy and my carpool buddy moved to Mississippi, making the drive down and back from Altavia (between 45 mins and 1:30, depending on traffic) a bit more nerve-wracking. I tend to get sleepy on the freeway, especially in a warm car or at night, so driving by myself at night, in winter, with the heater on, doesn't really appeal. :)

I really enjoy the feel of Darach practice--it's usually pretty small, but it's spearheaded by Dons Alex K. and Eogan ("Owen"), giving us a good ratio of Scarves to non-Scarves. They're both really willing to teach and pretty much everyone who attends the practice regularly is very friendly, laid back, and approachable, which really colors the whole ambiance of the practice for me. That's not to say that any of the other practices I've attended are stuffy or overly serious or in any way not fun--just that this one's smaller, so I get some more individual attention, which I like (spoiled brat that I am), and all the regulars there are very easy to get along with.

Anyway, I'm feeling pretty good about my fencing right now in general. Between the maintenance exercises and the fish oil, neither foot nor elbow have been bothering me much (I could feel my elbow working hard at practice yesterday, but it's not sore at all today). I've been working on incorporating more forward motion into my fight, and a shout-out is due here to Don Alex B., who led an impromptu class on sloping and compass steps at Altavia practice a month or so ago that I found really helpful.

Yesterday I was playing around with them with a fencer who I haven't fought a lot (I think he might be kind of new, not sure). He basically fought with lots of circling, lots of going backwards, and lots of sticking the sword out, hoping someone will run into it. Forward-moving aggression consisted pretty much exclusively of little shots at the hands and face--more of a "Don't come any closer!" than a genuine attack. It was a lot like fighting myself six months ago, with less hair. ;) I had fun experimenting with sloping steps to throw his circling off, or to invite him in closer so I could hit him. I concentrated mostly on my own defense and working through his sturdy parries and offhand-work, with some good success. Now I just have to work on making my advances more subtle--if I wasn't taking a step in to counter his circle, he could tell what I was doing and countered my advances quickly.

I did notice that I started getting frustrated with myself as I started getting tired at practice. It was interesting to note--I haven't had a lot of frustration with myself recently. Between time commitments and joint issues, I've been so glad to be out fencing at all that it's hard for me to have a bad time out on the field. :) Yesterday, though, my brain had ideas for stuff to do and none of it was quite working fast or fluidly enough--I think I was just getting tired, and I wasn't reacting quite as fast or as skillfully as I wanted to. Either that or because someone dropped a comment about my not doing the correct motion to counteract my opponent's defense, and it bothered me. I didn't think it did at the time, but it might have wormed its way into my brain and irked me. I'm disinclined to take my subconscious that seriously... ;) Not a big deal either way, just something worth noticing.

Let's see, what else is going on? Tourney season is almost upon us, Caid's Crown Tourney was this past Saturday, and I'm working on a new doublet. I hope the pattern I have now serves me well enough to get a fighting dress out of, as well. We'll see how the new doublet wears--I already know it fits me, but it remains to be seen how comfortable it's going to be. Working on garb has always been a bit of a challenge for me, because it ties into some body-image issues I've always had (and really, doesn't everyone have some body image issues? Come on, now.) It's been a long uphill battle to acknowledge and accept that the only way I'll feel like I look nice in my garb is by taking the time and effort into making nice garb, rather than just throwing a T-tunic on and trying to avoid mirrors for the whole event. :)

There's all of that and the fact that I really do think a nice, period appearance on the field is important (or at least an obvious attempt at a period appearance), so I really owe it to myself to make something nicer. My current doublet is basically a waster I cooked up quickly, trying to supplement my fighting gear, and ended up wearing full time after I gained some weight in the last quarter of college and hadn't lost. Now, a year and a half later, I've lost some of the weight and don't have any good excuses anymore. :)

Also coming along the pipe are slipcovers for my sneakers, a new hood, and hopefully a dress of some kind. I'd love to find some super-discounted brocade for a new gear bag as well, as the camp-chair bag I repurposed for my gear is on its last legs, but that's kind of an ongoing desire, not an active plan.

That's about it for now. See you next time--Same Enid time, same Enid channel.

The New Year: Plans, little thoughts, and a dash of whatnot.

This is just a little check-in post, not a lot of groundbreaking revelations here, just some stuff I've noticed and updates on current projects.

I took about a month off of fencing this winter, both by accident and by design--our cat went back into congestive heart failure and we decided to put her down, I traveled up to the Bay Area to be with my family for a week over the holidays, I got back into town and was booked solid for New Year's weekend, and then we got about a week of rain which mired our local practice and occurred around the same time I sprained my right foot, which I had injured the year before and which frustrated me hugely. It was a busy month, and between the emotional stuff, the physical stuff, and the logistics of the holidays, fencing got put on the back burner.

I fought yesterday at the Caid pre-Estrella melee practice, and I was pretty pleased with my performance. My parries are doing really well, and while my endurance isn't up to par (you mean a month of holiday food and no fencing has, like, detrimental effects? Madness!), overall I felt like I did well. My reflexes, if nothing else, seem to be continuing to improve. I no longer seem to be letting my offhand do all the work for me--both my sword and offhand parries were fairly good yesterday, and I felt like they worked well together. It's worth noting that my calibration suffered a bit after the time off, and a couple of my hits near the end of the day were rather hard. I felt crappy about it and apologized, naturally, and managed to get it under control in fairly short order.

I've been careful not to stress out my tennis elbow during the last couple of months, and I'm pleased to say I fenced for about four hours yesterday and am not feeling it at all today. I was having some trouble with it last week, but I took my fish oil twice a day and stretched it out with some reps on my one-pound hand weight, and that seems to have helped.

I could feel my recently-sprained foot muscles working really hard yesterday, but they didn't hurt in a bad way, if that makes sense. They ached and felt tight, but they didn't throb, feel hot, or sting/burn in the way I've come to associate with my body saying "Stop what you're doing immediately or face the wrath of your soft tissue!" I'm pleased to say I seem to have read myself right, because the foot's not sore at all today. I iced it last night and took some ibuprofen before I went out on the field, just in case, but I seem to be pretty much mended. I'm really reassured and pleased by the good results.

I also turned in my written marshaling test yesterday. I completed the events I needed as a Marshal-in-Training over the summer and fall, got the recommendations I needed from marshals, and spent some time last week working on the written test. I have a lot of issues with the so-called 'current' edition of the marshal's test, from a documentation standpoint, but I don't need to burden the webernets with them at the moment--suffice it to say that I haven't gotten official results back, but I think I did as well as I could, felt good about my answers, and hope to hear the same from the KRM.

So, what's the spring look like? Well, a few different things:

• We won't be making it to Estrella this year, which is actually kind of a relief. Don't get me wrong, we wouldn't go to Estrella at all if we didn't have a good time, but between two full-time jobs with no PTO or sick time, upcoming changes at my job (I hope!), and a beater truck that will need major repairs or to be replaced at some point in the next six months, I think Estrella would be more stressful than fun this year.
• I'm running the rapier tournaments and melee scenarios at King's Hunt this year. I'm stoked--I've run tournaments and pre-existing melees before (Blood of Heroes and the like), but I've never orchestrated a whole weekend's worth of fencing before. I'm a combination of excited and nervous, but I know I have lots of people I can ask for help and advice, so I'm looking forward to the challenge.
• I plan to experiment a bit more with fighting garb this spring--and by "experiment" I mean, "make something it's not embarrassing to be seen in." I'm slowly re-envisioning my craft corner to be friendlier, more functional, and generally less of a PITA to use. Right now there's a major energy barrier to doing anything sewing-related, just because the space is so cramped, messy, and generally overburdened with stuff. No matter how long I wait, the boxes of fabric don't seem to be making more space for themselves (is this normal? I'd expected them to breed some square footage by now. Maybe I need to play some Barry White.) so I'm starting to spread out a little bit. Anyway, the garb plans include a new doublet or fighting dress, slipcovers for my sneakers, and potentially a new hood.

Anyway, I think that's about it for now. Weights, fish oil, practice, and sewing machines, here I come. Onward and upward!

Back on the Horse; Notes on Fencing To and From the Ground.

Phew! It's been awhile!

I've had a busy few months, faithful ZARMers, culminating in a week of suck, a week of awesome!, and now another couple weeks of suck which seem to be receding. Forecast of slightly snarky, chance of showers up to Great Western War.

That's right, kids, it's that time again--time for Great Western War! Until today, I've only been looking towards the war as another Thing I Have To Do (not that I have to do it, but we already paid for it and it's one of those tricky things I know I'd want to do if I wasn't so bogged down with stuff). As of now, we're going, we're camping, and we'll be there Friday night and leave Sunday afternoonish. It's possible we'll have to bail early--among the pail of o nuuuuuuuuuu! the universe dumped on us this month was a heart problem with our two-year-old kitty, which has been hugely stressful, heartbreaking, and expensive. "Chance of showers" has pretty much summed up my entire emotional state for the last two weeks, and I'm just now catching my breath.

Anyway, one of the things I am looking forward to about the war is getting to fence my squirrely little heart out. I haven't been giving fencing as much love as it needs this summer, and it's showing in my game, but I'm still stoked to get out there and shake my groove thang for a couple days. I really want to give fencing more time in my schedule... I just need to figure out how to make said time! :)

The substance of this post is supposed to be all about fighting on the ground. Last Saturday at Caid Rapier Open, Laertes noticed I was having some issues fighting both against someone who's on the ground and when grounded myself, and that's some of what we worked on on Monday night at Altavia practice.

Basically, my problem is that I revert to some basic no-nos of fencing technique when I'm on the ground that I totally know better than to do when standing. For example, I tend to present a flat surface to my opponent by facing them head-on (in as much as my torso ever gets flat... bow chicka wow wow!). This could be solved by fencing like I'm standing up, which is to say with my right shoulder behind my left and offhand held farther forward and a bit higher than I'm usually accustomed. It's a fine line between protecting my head and protecting my stomach, but it's mostly a psychological line--anyone attacking me while I'm sitting down is going to have a substantially easier time hitting my head and chest than my stomach.

Problem number two, obviously, is the position of my offhand. It needs to be higher. Better. Stronger. Cheaper. Well, higher anyway. I have a natural aversion to raising it too high because it uses some underdeveloped muscles and tires my arm out more quickly (gosh, I wonder how I could fix that problem). It also feels safer to keep it low, because my parry up (ie, raising the blade of the dagger from a nine-o'clock to a twelve-o'clock position and returning it to nine) is much faster than my parry down (dropping the blade from nine to six and raising it back up). The parry down is also less controlled and uses more of my arm, so I hesitate to use it any more than I have to. More things to work on. Or, as Laertes said so very succinctly, "PARRY DRILLS."

Fighting a legged fighter from a standing position will take a similar attitude adjustment. I have a pretty good foot void that keeps my forward leg from getting taken most of the time, but I still tend to stand facing the legged opponent most of the time anyway. My main strategy fighting a legged person is to take crappy little potshots in the hope of getting a good hit on the hand, arm, or head, which doesn't really work for me too well. For some reason, fighting like I was fighting a, you know, standing fighter, hadn't occurred to me. You know, all that basic stuff about engagement? Line closing? Constraint? Dagger use? All that? Yeah, no, none of that. Potshots, though. Heeeeeey.

There's nothing really ground-breaking in this post, discovery-wise, just little bits of technique I feel like it's worth commemorating (in part because I feel silly for not realizing them before).

Triumph! Or, how I made friends with my brachioradialis.

A Day in the Life of the Elbow

When last we left our intrepid (insipid?) blogger, Enid was mourning the death of her left arm.

Well, boys and girls, Enid learned a new word this month:

Brachioradialis.

It all goes like this:

After the last post, I got a lot of commentary and feedback (usually in person, rather than in type, which is why it isn't too crowded down there in the archives) from other fencers. Fencers I respect, fencers with years more experience than I have, fencers who I want to be like when I grow up. Almost universally, their response was "Take time off now, before it gets any worse." So I put my feelings on the matter aside, carefully considered their advice, inserted my fingers into my ears, and went LA LA LA LA LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

But I did everything else they told me to do. :) Namely, I went out and got a pressure-point brace, started an anti-inflammatory regimen, made sure to ice it every night, and had it massaged twice a day by kindly Tibetan monks. Well, not really with the monks. But that would have been awesome. And let me tell ya, I wore that brace every damn day. I wore it driving, wore it when while I cooked, wore it playing video games, wore it sewing, and wore it at work (especially when typing. Talk about tendon isolation, wow. Typing was a pain in the butt. Well, arm. You know what I mean). The only times I didn't wear it was when I was in bed or when I'd been wearing it long enough that it started to chafe.

I also picked up some fish oil supplements and have been taking them 1-2 times per day, but that's more incidental--they're supposed to help with your joints and other things longer-term, and I'd been meaning to start on that for awhile, so it seemed like the appropriate thing to do.

The esteemed and extremely spiffy Cap'n Lot also took me out in his backyard and schooled me... in how to hold my sword more effectively. He worked with me for about an hour? ish? on getting the sword better balanced in my hand, and maintaining a more correct grip and balance through the lunge, so I'm gripping it less tightly and letting the weight of the sword counterbalance properly in my hand. It's interesting to note that it was much easier to do a "proper" Italian lunge (first the arm, then the body, then the foot at the very end... when do you move your head, anyway? with the body?) with the "proper" grip on the sword, but other than noticing the improvement, I'm not really well-educated enough to observe much about that.

I was a little apprehensive about working with the arm when I planned on going to Altavia practice two days later (fencing two days in a row is what first made it start hurting), but when I was holding it right it didn't hurt at all. It actually relieved some of the pain in my arm by using different muscles, which forced the tight ones to relax so the others could contract. It was great.

Even better was the fact that it didn't hurt any worse at all the next day, and had even improved. I'd been noticing incremental improvements over the course of the week, usually first thing in the morning, with increasing soreness as I used the left arm during the day, so I expected to feel sore again on Sunday, or at least the same level of pain and weakness, but it had actually improved. It was very encouraging. I'll have to keep working on holding my sword the way he said to, because it was very comfortable, but very different from what I'm used to, and as I concentrated on lunging properly, I found myself sliding back into my old grip.

The trend continued at Lyondemere Anniversary last weekend, where by the end of the day my entire arm was exhausted, but the elbow wasn't making a peep. I pretty much danced and sang.

I woke up Sunday morning really sore, but in a bunch of new places and no old ones. My shoulder ached a little, my left lat was sore, and my bicep and tricep were both sore, but my elbow felt good. It ached a little bit, and felt warm like it had been working hard, but it didn't have that persistent, stinging throb that it's had in the last few weeks. It was really nice. It had felt good the week before, but the fact that I could go out and fence all day and have minimal side effects the next day was really reassuring.

I feel like I'm doing the right stuff to take care of it, and that's excellent news. Now the trick will be remembering to continue taking care of it as it keeps feeling better. I think I might keep wearing the brace at work, because typing really does isolate the poor bugger.

Fun at Lyondemere and New Drills

In other news, Lyondemere Anniversary was a lot of fun. I got to hang out with good folks (and adorable babies) and fence some new folks (and adorable babies) and generally have a lovely day (also, there were babies. They were pretty cute).

Laertes and I got to hang a bit, which was good. He gave me a new parry drill because I'm still having trouble synchronizing my right and left hands. I can parry fine with the sword or with the dagger, and I can attack fine with the sword, but I can hardly parry with the dagger and attack with the sword simultaneously. Well, correction--I can do it great when I think about it, but that kind of defeats the purpose. I need to get the counterattack into an instinctive, fluid motion, and specifically one This drill starts nice and slow, then gets progressively faster as it gets more comfortable. The drill is a shot to the hip, shortly followed by a low parry, then a shot to the shoulder and a high parry. The idea is that your opponent is doing the same thing in mirror, so when you attack them, they're parrying, and as they attack you parry.

I definitely need to concentrate on doing the first few rounds of this drill slowly, getting my parries locked without overcommitting them and really working on lunging with a good turn of the hip for distance, not snapping the arm out to full extension (that way lies tendon strain).

I'm having a different issue with the sword parry--I tend to take my point dramatically off-line while I'm parrying because I'm parrying with my whole arm, rather than just by adjusting the angle of my elbow and shoulder. Rather than lifting or dropping my hand, I swipe with the whole arm from one side to another, which is effective, but slow, and only works defensively. I can't counterattack effectively when my guard is off to the side, and if my opponent is fast enough to counter my parry, I'm pretty much hosed.

So in comes drill number two, some basic parries with my point resting lightly on something. I'm a little worried that I'll end up really resting the point on whatever it is (a tree, a wall, a kitten, whatever) and defeat the purpose of the drill, but I'll give it my best shot. I think if I do this one before my arm gets tired and with good concentration, I'll be okay.

Both of these drills are designed to be done with someone else, but I think I can do them at home. That inside wall of my patio is looking awfully inviting. Not to mention I have this boyfriend...

Gyldenholt Anniversary, 2010

Fun fun fun at Gyldenholt!

This here's a big ol' post, so in the interest of easy reading, I've chunked it. It's a tech writer thing. Trust me, you'll like it.

Tourney Fights

My first tourney fight was with Don Lot. I have to confess to a moment of "Oh for God's sake" when that got called, because my two fights at Altavia Anny. were both against White Scarves, and we all know how that ended. :)

I actually thought my fight went pretty well up until the very end. I tried to put aside the knowledge that I wasn't going to be a challenging fight for him, and that by extension the whole fight was going to be an exercise in me trying new things and him letting me, which feels like an indulgence in a tourney setting, which, rather than encouraging, just defeats me in my head regardless of anyone else's intention or mindset. Oh, the headspace. Look at it go.

That reaction isn't about anyone else's demeanor or how I feel like I'm treated, on the field or off. It's all about me and my insecurities. I'm completely aware of this and, while it's a common reaction, I know it's a bad reaction, and no one is responsible for it but me. Just FYI. :)

I successfully put all that psychological crap aside for the first minute or two of the fight, while I was getting Lot's measure and gauging what it looked like he was going to do--it's hard to explain, but I can sort of tell what kind of fight my opponent is bringing in the first minute or so of a bout. It's not about guards or footwork or anything, it's about their speed, their aggression, probably a bunch of subconscious body language that I can read but not acknowledge consciously. Anyway, the first few passes and feints were spent gauging the fight a little bit.

I think my main problem was that the headspace started creeping up on me and I gave up too quickly. I threw a couple iffy shots and when they were parried, got in a bit too close and got killed. I didn't really believe in the final shot I threw which opened me up to get killed, and I came off the field disappointed that I hadn't tried harder. Shook it off, round two!

I won round two. It wasn't a pretty kill--I got a garbage shot in on the head that I barely felt as my opponent took my right leg. I did feel really good about my defense in the bout--I had a lot of nice sword parries and blocked a couple good two-hit combinations. I didn't love the killshot, but I felt really solid about my defense.

Round three took me out, and I know exactly why I died, so I was satisfied. I stepped out into the Angry Druids shot and forgot to use my offhand. I was ready to take the second step with my right foot, bringing my body off line and into the opponent's one-to-two o'clock space, and I could feel my right arm moving up to bring the dagger into place, but I got sniped in the throat before it could get there. If I had moved the dagger with the first step, I probably could have blocked it. Better luck next time.

Queen's Guard Challenges

Then we had the Queen's Guard challenges against the White Scarves and Gyldenholt Baronial Guard. They were a lot of fun, and I really felt like I fenced well.

The first fight was against the Baronial Guard, and it was great. I ended up being the last guard on the field and held off two Baronial guards, literally with my main hand behind my back. In part that last bit was because they were too polite to rush me two-on-one, but still, it looked impressive. :)

I was in the middle of the line at the beginning of that fight, which isn't great for me--I move around too much to fight productively in the middle of the line. When pinned in on both sides, I tend to go backwards, which is really bad when I'm fighting in a line! Fortunately, five Queen's Guards versus six Baronial Guards meant both lines fell apart fairly quickly and no one died because I took that step backwards. As our line dissolved and theirs pressed forward, I killed the person right in front of me, and then the person immediately to their left with a couple shots to the chest and collarbone. It was, in a word, awesome.

The two lines broke into one-on-one fights across the field, and as I was looking at a big tall guy thinking He could shoot my head right off my neck, Cecilia sniped my hand through my guard in a beautiful shot. I was shouting begrudging compliments at her as I switched hands and handed off my dagger, then booked it across the field to team up with Lorccan against Sigbjorn, Cecilia, and Yentz. Eventually it was me one handed me versus Yentz and Cecilia, which lead to my epic and heroic death, paeans to which will be sung through the annals of time by tender-footed virgins, glory glory, etc.

After that came the fight with the White Scarves. I died fast in that one, but I did get in a great shot that popped under a buckler and into a stomach. I even guarded my head properly with my dagger. Preen preen preen.

3DC 10th Anniversary Melees

I loved the melees. I thought they were original, had multiple possible roles for each fighter (killer, guard, pourer of whiskey, whatev) and the inclusion of props (like the table) made it unlikely that the scenarios would become boring line fights. There was little room in each scenario for twattery, given the expressed rules and objectives. Overall, a big win for Raz, who designed the scenarios. Good on ya, buddy!

My team was Don Colwyn and Avenel, who are both a lot of fun to fight with and against. We made finals, and got taken out by Roisin, Nathanial, and one other guy whose name I can't remember (Sorry, nameless dude!). Before that, I killed a couple people in the two-life res, and the first scenario. Fun fun fun.

Buckler Time with Avenel

After that, Avenel grabbed me and gave me some buckler schoolin'. I've felt like my buckler work hasn't been great in the last few months--I've been playing with dagger and baton so much, I tend to swat with anything you put in my right hand. When that thing's a 17" round wooden buckler, it's not effective. Either that, or I stick my hand straight out and just leave it there, not doing anything with it, and trust the surface area to protect me. BORING.

Avenel suggested I cross my right hand over my left and use the edge of the buckler to punch forward with every strike. I love this idea in principle, but certain aspects of female anatomy make getting as stark an angle as he does difficult for me. He literally sits his right hand over his left, the buckler angled over the hilt so the edge is almost parallel to the blade. I could manage the angle with his buckler (he has a dome in the middle of his and can close his hand all the way around the grip--my buckler is flat, so I can only get my fingers through the strap and flatten the buckler against the back of my hand, if necessary), but the hand and arm positioning was difficult given the placement of my guard. I could do the angle fine if my guard was about a foot higher, almost first and second. Not effective for general practice.

The idea of punching the edge of the buckler forward with the guard of my sword was really interesting. It ties in nicely with what Laertes' has been teaching me about using sword and offhand simultaneously in an attack. I could see the buckler-over-blade technique in particular working well in an Angry Druids scenario. Lots of valuable stuff to think about. I very much appreciated Avenel taking the time to walk me through the geometry and give me the suggestions--especially after he made the three-way finals in the tourney and probably had some other stuff to think about at the time. :)

Final Thoughts

Last week, I made it down to Altavia fighter practice. It was a lot of fun, and I think I'm going to try and go more regularly. The Isles practice has become really familiar for me, and I think I'd like to try fighting some new people. I also spend too much time hanging out there, and not enough fencing. In the interest of actually keeping my mind on the game, I think I'll be going to Altavia practice more and Isles practice less. It's a long drive, but it's feasible... we'll see what happens in the long run.

In other news, I'm starting to actually feel competitive. I was legitimately disappointed when my team didn't win the melees and wanted to fight in the tourney longer. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Will this help or harm my Zen? Only time will tell, I guess.

Fighter Practice, 05/05/10

Did a bit of fencing at fighter practice last week. I went up against Alke, who hasn't been around recently but is always a fun fight, and Zhivana.

I wasn't really in the analytical headspace while fighting, but I did do some musing on drills, which I'll share and expound on below:

The Angry Druids Drill

This drill involves an attack in 2nd/3rd and small forward motion, much like the standard Italian lunge. The key difference is that instead of going straight forward, I pop my foot out to the side and let the motion carry me laterally, essentially moving my body in a 45 degree angle toward my opponent, rather than straight at them.

I've practiced this drill a fair amount over the last few weeks, and am slowly getting it into the autopilot section of my brain, where my first reaction to a forward attack from a right-handed person is to wait for them to withdraw and counterattack by popping out to the side, or engage an incoming attack with an off-hand parry and simultaneous counter in the lateral position.

So far, the results have been good. I have yet to pop out into an oncoming blade, or do one of the spectacular blade-bending pratfalls that elicits sympathetic "OOH!"s from the audience in my head. I've even, like, killed people with this shit. Bene, si?

Well, it still doesn't feel quite right. The problem is, I feel like it takes significantly more effort to get out of the lunged position than it does to get into it. It could be a couple things, and I'm not sure which one it is:

1. My weight is too far over on my left leg when I land, or
2. I'm leaning forward too far and throwing my butt out behind me to compensate, or
3. My foot isn't correct, which makes my knee not right, which throws my hips out of alignment, or
4. My foot isn't right and because of that, I'm losing my center and getting too much weight over on my left side, or
5. Some combination of 3 and 4 (I think it might be this one).

Whatever the issue is, I don't feel like I can recover from this position fast enough to protect myself--it's about as fast as a regular lunge, but because my weight gets redistributed oddly, I feel stuck in it and have trouble drawing back up to my regular position.

I appreciate that the proper execution of this drill is made and broken by the position of the hips during and immediately after the forward foot (for my purposes, my left foot) hits the ground. At first I really wasn't moving my weight enough, or I'd move it too much--I'd either end with my left leg sort of pointing off in the distance somewhere with no significant change in my torso compared to a standard lunge, or I'd end up with 80% of my weight on my left foot, my knee bent just absurdly far, my right foot almost coming off the ground behind me, and way lower to the ground than I usually am when I lunge. I imagine I looked extremely silly.

In short, I feel like I'm doing much better with this drill than I was, and I find it really effective and useful--but something about the execution just hasn't quite clicked yet. Ponder ponder.

In other news, a different drill is working great for me. I can't practice it by myself, but it's incredibly easy to use against an opponent (although that same ease of use makes it difficult to use in all the guards, because I'm only using it for the guards my opponents attack me in). It's a simple flick of the tip as an attack is coming towards you--effectively, it's a small parry with the false edge of your blade that becomes an attack with the strong through a quick turn of the wrist.

It's difficult to describe in text, but incredibly easy to use in real life, and works much better with my brain than the classic Italian "parry that is also attack" style. I don't often trust myself or my skills enough to parry-attack correctly, and I think the self-doubt and hesitation results in me getting killed a lot more than improper technique... :) The simultaneous parry-attack is one of the first things I learned in fencing, and I know I do it right--I just don't believe it when I do it, if that makes sense.

So, pluses and minuses. I know I'm making progress, although it feels much slower than I'd like. :) Onward and upward.

Crown Tourney, Spring 2010

Crown this weekend was really fun. It's always nice to camp for a weekend without having to pack the truck to bursting and drive 5+ hours--that's one of the (many, many) things I like about GWW, King's Hunt, and Crown (when we have it).

Anyway, I suppose I should talk about the elephant in the room...

On Sunday morning, Don Laertes officially accepted me as his student. We've been working on various fencing things at every event for the last 6 months or so (since Altavia Anniversary and Investiture and except for Estrella, which he didn’t go to), and I’m really excited to be working with him. It sounds silly, but it’s very flattering to feel like somebody is taking a personal interest in helping me improve something I care a lot about.

It was funny—as soon as he first mentioned the studenting thing to me as a possibility, Laertes stressed that becoming his student wasn’t an accomplishment per se, so much as it was an acknowledgement of the relationship we already had and a commitment to stick to it and continue to work together. So when he made his little speech Sunday morning, a bunch of people came up to me and started hugging me, shaking my hand, and congratulating me, and I was very surprised! Not that I mind all the praise and petting, of course—my ego loved it. :) I was just in the headspace that I was becoming someone’s student precisely because I have so much more to learn and so little experience, having people come up to me and congratulate me about it was completely unexpected.

It kind of threw some stuff into perspective for me. Possibly more on that later, we’ll see.

Anyway, right after that we went off and worked on some stuff. One of the first things he had me do was stand with him in the middle of the eric, in engagement range, and back up to within 3 feet of the eric ropes without looking at them. I stopped about 4 feet away, which was okay with me—I was worried I wouldn’t stop in time and would go over them! Then he had me do it with my eyes closed. Stopped about 3 feet away—good stuff!

Then he told me to stay at the edge of the eric, close my eyes, and advance to engagement range without looking at him. I did it, but I opened my eyes on the last step to make sure I wouldn’t impale him (never mind that he’s a grown up and could probably have moved out of the way in time…). Did it again. At that point I’d gone the same distance enough times that I didn’t feel like I was really feeling it anymore per se—I caught myself counting steps, so when I’d successfully completed the exercise I went back to the ropes and asked him to move back a bit so I wouldn’t be able to tell the distance from memory. He did, and I stopped exactly in engagement range. Maybe a little close, but dude.

Laertes said something along the lines of “see, your body already has really good judge of distance,” and I wanted to yell “Yeah, did you see that? Did you see me walk right there? I walked all OVER this eric! I’m a fucking NINJA!” And it’s true. I felt like a fucking ninja. Or possibly a tiger. Or a shark. Something really cool that can kill you really fast. Anyway. It was very exciting.

Then there were cones. And footwork drills. Footwork drills that had me going around the cones a lot. Then backwards. It’s sort of hard to describe, but I’ll be doing them tonight at fighter practice if anyone wants to watch or play. :)

Last but not least, I was presented with my very own inaugural 7 pound hand weight. At Great Western, Laertes taught me some wrist and arm strengthening exercises (I think he saw how much I was suffering because I hadn’t fenced in like a month before that), and suggested I do them with a small weight. When I saw him on Sunday he gave me a 7 pounder and told me that it was my goal.

I’m supposed to work up to being able to do 4 sets of 20 of each type of exercise (there are 5) with the 7 pound weight. Yesterday I decided my little 1-pounder was too boring and went to Big 5. After about 10 minutes of (probably very silly looking) waffling between the 2 and 3 pound weights, I went for a 3 pounder in a lovely shade of Kelly green. The 2 pounders just didn’t feel big enough to challenge me (and they were hot pink, which had absolutely nothing to do with my choice). I’ve been doing the exercises on the drive to work, and this morning I could do 1 warm-up with with 1 pounder and 3 sets with the 3 pounder before my arms got all warm and were like “No more!” I was very proud of myself.

Let’s see, this post has gotten significantly longer than I’d first imagined. I guess I’m just very excited to be taking some concrete steps in my fencing career. Hopefully I’ll have something more interesting to say in these posts than “Good pointwork today” from now on!

Oh, and thanks again for all the support, y’all. Either from the comments or the congratulations at Crown, it means a lot to me, and I really appreciate it. <3

Estrella War, 2010

I fenced much better at Estrella this year than last year. I even zippered a line with the help of the suave and dashing Marcos de la Cruz! I haven't done that since my first Estrella, when I was killing people left, right, and center because I was obviously shiny new and everyone ignored me. :)

Cue my brags: He and I were keeping a line with him anchoring a corner on my right. He said “You ready?” and I said “Yep!” and he took out the guy directly in front of me and turned that into a charge at the guy directly in front of him. That guy, who was anchoring the corner on his side, backed up a couple steps which gave me room to kill the guy on my left, then the guy after him, and the guy after him… I know it doesn’t sound like a huge deal, but I was very proud of myself and, more importantly, I remember the whole thing clearly and understand why it worked the way it did. No tunnel vision! Yay me!

I don't have much new to say about how I fenced at Estrella. I did pretty well avoiding the melee tunnel vision (meaning when I res'd I managed to find a tactically useful place to go fight, rather than just filing back into the meat grinder lines, which I've always found frustrating and exhausting). My point control was good--I took lots of arms and hands. I didn't get killed in lines because I wasn't paying attention to the right people (this was my big weakness last year, so I'm really glad to be able to say that). Except for one notable exception, I didn't get pissed off and, fortunately, wasn't hit too hard at all. It was nice.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about the social aspect of rapier, which is part of what's kept this post from being written for so long.

My Estrella post:

First, and most importantly, I'm not perfect. I'm not a saint, and I'm certainly not a consistent model of exemplary conduct on the field. I don't want this to come off as a sermon, or a rant, or a diatribe... I just have strong opinions and feel the need to analyze them, and how do I do that best? By writing about it, of course!

In terms of fencing conduct, exceptions must be made for different Kingdoms. We all have our own rules, and, just as importantly, our own unspoken guidelines which most of us abide by but aren't written down anywhere. I'm not one of those people who goes around trash-talking every fencer from outKingdom (or from a certain specific Kingdom) because they applied their rules to our fight. I don't like getting hit too hard, just like everyone else, but getting hit too hard is not the same as getting hit with positive pressure. I don't like getting hit from the side without seeing it coming, but I don't get pissed off when it happens if the person who killed me is from a kingdom with different engagement rules than Caid's (180-degree engagement versus 120, etc.). As far as I know, no Kingdom's rules encourage hitting as hard as you can, hitting multiple times, or hitting from outside range. Those are the faults of the fencer, not the entire rapier community of a Kingdom.

Nobody's perfect. People make mistakes and other people get pissed off because of them. I tend to do both, occasionally at the same time.  I do my share of smack-talking and chest-thumping in camp, but I try to leave it off the field. I try really hard to control my temper on the field, not start any trash talk, and be generous in my stated opinions of people and how questionable scenarios played out. Sometimes I fail, but I try. We all have our weaknesses, and my big mouth is mine. I've known this for a long time, so I try to keep it under control on the field, even if I have to vent once I'm off (I'm a verbal processor, I have to talk to get my feelings in order and get them out).

(CONFESSION: I did get pissed off at one point at Estrella and called someone a jackass as I was walking back to res, but I said it very quietly to myself and made sure I was far enough away that he didn't hear me (Lot heard me, but Lot hears everything bad that I do. He's like the principal of rapier.). Dude had just blown off a kill to the chest after telling me "I've taken a lot harder," so either he felt it and decided not to take it or he didn't feel it, which is possible... I felt contact when I hit him, but accidents happen and I know it's easy to blow off a shot on the melee field. I like to think I still would have taken it had I been in his shoes, but I can't be sure. I still thought it was good. ANYWAY. That's neither here nor there--I was annoyed. By the time I got back to the res point, I was over it. Bottom line: It was the wrong way to handle it, it was immature, but I knew the person wasn't going to have a real discussion with me about it and I just needed to do something with my anger so I didn't bring it back onto the field with me. See? I'm not perfect. Moving on.)

All that being said, there are some standards of behavior which I apply to everyone, of every rank and experience level, from every kingdom. In my opinion, these standards must be met or at least worked towards for everyone to have a good time on the field. It's extremely disappointing to see people blow off shots, refuse to apologize or even acknowledge that they hit too hard, or start counter-accusing people who put them on the spot by calling out their bad behavior.

Worst of all is when you see someone who's got some clout in another Kingdom behaving like a high school quarterback in the locker room. I had to think about why it was such a big deal to me that people of rank conduct themselves better than the Average Joe, so let's talk this one through, shall we? In my opinion, if you've got rank, you've got even more responsibility than the average person to conduct yourself well around members of other Kingdoms, regardless of their rank. If you're a White Scarf, or a Knight crossing over to the fencing field, or a Laurel, or a King, you are a living, breathing representation of the populace of your Kingdom even more so than the average Joe Fencer.

So why do people with rank count more than the Average Joe? Because we're not actually a feudal society in the SCA, nor are we an (entirely) merit-based one. Certain awards can be given for sheer skill in one area, with less emphasis on service or conduct (Kingship and, I imagine, Laurelling--I don't know that many Laurels or that much about how they're made, so I'm a little hesitant to make that judgment), but even those awards carry the weight of expectation--as a Laurel, you're expected to distribute your time and skill among the people, educating them and encouraging their interests. As a King, you're making a commitment of 3-9 months, depending on the Kingdom, to serve your people as a visual and behavioral ideal--for six months, you become Arthur, and your Queen becomes Guinevere, and you have to handle all the positive and negative stereotypes encompassed in those roles. But by and large, in the SCA, you get where you get by being able to play nice with others as well as excelling at combat, art, or service. You rise because people believe you're worth it. As it says on the inside of the Caid crown, You Rule Because They Believe.

Now if you take your pointy hat or your pretty belt or your shiny scarf out on the field and act like an asshole, you're sending a very clear message that isn't just about you, but about every member of your Kingdom, as well. This person is acknowledged as exemplary in their skill or their martial art in their Kingdom, even though they're being a total dick on the field. Well, they're from [insert name of Kingdom here], not my Kingdom. I guess they do things differently there.

Subtext here being, I guess they don't care if a person's an asshole there. Or maybe, I guess they don't think s/he's an asshole there.

Then, of course, you look at a person like that, a person of rank who’s expected to return some service to their Kingdom taking students, and what else can you think? You’re seeing the perpetuation of some pretty awful behavior being encouraged and ingrained on the minds and conduct of people who will, one day, probably take their own turn leading the community. And yes, some of those students will probably grow up to be perfectly nice people (just like some of the students of perfectly nice people have grown up to be assholes), but the message is the same—people from this Kingdom want to be this guy’s students. Clearly, people in this Kingdom don’t think he’s an asshole.

These are very bad reactions to have. After the initial reaction, of course we all know that the actions of one person don't represent the opinions, conduct, or personality of their whole Kingdom. That being said, when you look at a person who's been awarded, praised, and touted up and down their Kingdom who consistently acts like a jerk on the field and doesn't do anything to change it, you start to think That Kingdom has different values than my Kingdom. Eventually, this becomes That Kingdom doesn’t care about chivalry/honor/ as much as my Kingdom.

So what do we do when we see a person like that, a person who is apparently so high up on their horse that they either can’t hear the admonitions of their peers, or don’t care? I don’t have any good solutions here, so I’m looking for suggestions.

It seems like time doesn’t change a person who blows off shots, a person who hits too hard and laughs about it, a person who yells at the person they’ve just injured, a person who cheats. Do we need more aggressive marshalling? If we had it, would this solve the problem if the offenders had rank? (Personally, I think more aggressive marshalling would drive me crazy, especially on the war field where it seems like every time a marshal has a conversation of more than ten words with someone we have to call a hold, but it’s an option. It might even help cool tempers a little, I don’t know). Do we need someone to just yell at these guys until they get it? I’ve seen that happen, or start to happen, and it doesn’t seem to work.

I’ve found that the only way I can deal with these guys and still respect other members of the fencing community from their Kingdoms is by pretending they don’t have the rank that they do—after all, if they rule because I believe, or if our awards are really just symbols of inner quality, if I don’t see the quality, why should I acknowledge the award? And this is a terrible perspective to have! So how else can I acknowledge my anger, do something with it rather than choking it down, and not feel like I’ve bowed my head to someone who doesn’t deserve it?

How do you get an asshole to respect you as much as he respects himself?

Okay, two pages later I think I’ve about exhausted that topic… for now. ;)

Thoughts? Comments? Feedback? Flames? Lay it on me!

Dun Or War Practice, 01/31/10

Fencing at Dun Or this weekend was challenging, but overall went really well.

About 20 mins before we got to the site, my body sent up the red flag that I had definitely not gotten enough sleep last night, so I arrived at the site with a slight headache, some nausea, and general crankiness. I'm usually okay when I haven't gotten enough sleep, but I already had some sleep debt from the last couple days and I don't exactly wake up lightening-fast anyway, so if I'm sleep deprived and expecting to have to do anything more complicated than suck down coffee and stare at the computer first thing in the AM, it's bad news bears. In retrospect, I probably could have completed the wakeup process if I'd had Nate drive instead of doing so myself, but that's neither here nor there.

A couple warmups later, I was mostly awake but still had a headache. Some edamame and water fixed it, and I was good to go. Pretty much as soon as the melees started, Laertes positioned himself right next to me and started up what would be an essentially nonstop stream of advice and information. This might drive the average person crazy, but I'm definitely not average--I'm a huge multitasker.

(This is part of why I don't go to movies in the theater very often--the idea of sitting in the dark staring at something and doing nothing else for two hours makes me twitchy just thinking about it. Maybe my little brother's not the only one in my family with ADD. Look, a butterfly! ANYWAY.)

So in the first melee I got killed while paying too much attention to following instructions, but after that I got the swing of things and life improved dramatically. Maybe I was in a "learning" headspace or something, but for some reason it was very easy for me to see the open spots on the field, the areas where the gentle application of a little pressure could seriously mess things up for the other team. Usually my eye is drawn to the groups on the field, the clusters of people in lines or pockets doing something. Usually I try to get around the back and DFB some folks, which has limited success. This time, Laertes had me follow him around while he wreaked some havoc in the backfield, and something clicked in my brain. Then things got seriously fun.

I still died too much. I need to work on my reaction time, and my parry-ripostes. Especially the parry-ripostes. Onward and upward.

More practice tonight--we'll see how much gets done with some of Isles wiped out by post-event fatigue and a traveling head cold. I don't really want to go because my insomnia's still acting up and I just want to curl into a ball and sleep for about 12 hours, but some exercise will probably help me sleep better tonight. Well, some exercise, some booze, some time in the spa, and a melatonin pill. Hellllll yeah, melatonin pill.

Fighter Practice, 01/27/2010

Fencing on Wed. was generally uneventful.

Did some slow work with Theo--got her to close the line, lunge properly, and guard her head with her dagger all at once, which was cool. She was just sort of jabbing at me with her arm and no body commitment, so I explained a little bit about calibration and how lunging properly can actually help protect you better than just being out of the way and poking with your arm while keeping your body as far back as possible. She seemed to get it.

I asked her after if it was okay that I was dumping all this information on her, and she said yes, so I guess I'm doing the right stuff. :)

After that I fenced with Elo. She's a fun fight--her primary offhand is cloak, so even though we were going with sword and baton, she had a lot of swirly motion in her body--like when she parried she would roll her whole offhand-shoulder forward like she was trying to foul my point with a nonexistent cloak. Of course, I realize this now, but at the time I was just sort of distracted. She used the foul-with-cloak-then-counterpunch technique really well, especially given that she was using a baton. :) I should have manipulated that more effectively--every time she did it, I either died or parried messily. If I'd had a dagger, I could have rushed in and ganked her, but didn't happen.

Good point control, though. I snaked in and tapped her all pretty on the chest a couple times, and I solved the baton problem by taking her hand. Over and over and over. Then I would give up my baton, she would take my primary hand, and we would start over. Not effective.


In other news, I love my baton. It's good that I don't fight with it very often, because it's totally a crutch, but I love it so much. It's like a huge, heavy dagger that I can beat up other people's swords with, distract them, or use as a windshield wiper. I don't need good defense as long as I have my baton, right? Right?

...Guys?

Fighter Practice, 01/06/2010

ETA: This post was originally on my LiveJournal.

This is the first of what I hope will be a series of posts as I try to improve my fencing game. I'm not locking these to my SCA-peeps group, just in case those of you who aren't in the SCA are interested... but I'm also cutting it in case you aren't. :)

Last week I went fencing for the first time since I tore ligaments in my foot, and it was overall very successful. I hadn't even held trusty Idris for about 2.5 months (blasphemy!), but putting on the gear and picking him up again felt really nice. I've lost some arm and leg musculature in those months--I think that's how Michelle Obama keeps her arms so toned, she secretly works out with a schlager.

I only fought two opponents before my foot started bugging me. Zhivana was my first fight--she deflowered my new dagger, which has yet to be named. I really, really like fighting Zhivana. She always gives me a workout--we have a habit of one kicking the other's ass for 5 or 6 bouts and then switching. New dagger was awesome--felt like a feather in my hand. I only thought it was my baton once or twice and tried to parry shots that I should have caught with my sword, which leads nicely to my next fight...

Lodovico and I went a few rounds before I called on account of tired. I have pretty good point control and was very pleased by how often I took his right hand or arm. On the needs-improvement side, I realized about halfway through our bouts that a) I was taking a lot of shots on the left side of my torso and shoulder and b) my head felt completely unprotected.

Re: the torso shots: I think I need to stop fencing with baton for awhile--the reason I was taking shots on my left side was because I wasn't getting my sword in to parry enough. Part of that's because my arm was tired, but that's not the primary reason--the thought that I actuallyneeded to parry more with my sword didn't even occur to me until we were driving home. My basic guard tends to angle the baton or dagger over the sword, so I can windshield-wiper parry as fast as possible, and using a baton makes up for a lot of sloppiness and reduced speed in my sword arm.

Re: the head shots: Lodovico didn't take any of the offered headshots, but I didn't have the sensation that my face was hanging out with Zhivana, so I think it's because he's a little taller than me. I could understand feeling like my head was unprotected if he was one-shotting me to the face every other bout, but he wasn't--it was just a feeling I had. I think it was a valid feeling, is all. :) One of the weak spots about fencing in Isles is that not many of the potential opponents are taller than I am. Darach's better, but I'm still so self-conscious around all those folks that the (two or three) times I've been to those practices I never fence very much or very well. Which leads me into my next point...

I'm still super-self-conscious about fencing to the point of getting frustrated with myself really easily. I flat out refuse to fight Todde or Dylan anymore because I don't like how angry it makes me. I think it's a combination of being very close to both of them emotionally so I want to feel like Dylan's equal and feel like I'm actually learning the things Todde is teaching when we spar, which I often don't because he kills me so quickly and unfailingly. I actually thought this was me being completely neurotic until I mentioned it to Laertes--he had asked me if I had anyone to spar with regularly and when I said it was just Dylan he said that he'd figured out from living with and fencing with Batista (sp?) that there was some whole other headgame that could play itself out while fencing with your SO that maybe wouldn't be very conducive to a learning environment. I already knew this, but I thought it was just me being crazy. It still may be me being crazy, but now I know it's not justme. :)

It's easier to fight with a) people that I don't know very well or b) people who are categorized as "students, just like me!" in my head, like most of the current Isles crew. I know all of my mental and physical roadblocks are resolvable, but how to resolve them? Not so sure on that. Hence these posts--Imma get edumacated, either by you, gentle readers, with your deft and accurate commentary, or by my own brain because writing shit down is part of how I process difficult mental or emotional concepts.

Unrelated note: I've noticed that my defense is pretty good-okay when I'm just standing still, and even better when I'm backing up and controlling the tempo that way, but when I go forward or someone charges at me at top speed, it all falls apart. Bailing out of a charge and waiting for them to come at me again or trying to get a potshot in while they recover doesn't seem to have much effect. I don't know if I'm afraid of hitting them too hard if I stand my ground and punk 'em or if I just don't like big speedy things rushing at me--probably both. And why does my defense fall apart when I go forward? I should know where my opponents' weapons and offhands are regardless of how near to or far from them I am, and if I'm defending myself properly, the physical proximity to my opponent shouldn't matter.

So, current goals for fencing:
* Go forward more. Laertes said, and it sounds like a good idea.
* Better parries and single-sword defense (or at least better left-handed defense).
* Less thinking and analyzing while fencing, more Zen. Zen fencing. Zencing.